haha.. just POP like on wednesday.. Much have changed.. my life, my time not so much of my character.. but there's still changes that i deem positive i guess.. started to pack my own bed lol like too use to it cos ns no choice..

Changes seem to be good and bad.. some that i'm still trying to adapt myself to.. Is seriously quite fast, is been two mths since the converstion from a cillivian to a NSF, i wonder to myself would things be different if i was still a cilivian?

All the freedom, the time that i used to have all seem to be taken away.. the happiness seem to be lacking.. not saying that life suck but there's things that i can't do like i used to.. all the time we had to play, go for run at night, supper and stuff like that all being taken away at the instant.. Kind of dread ns life..but still got to serve 1yr and 8mths..

Though life in ns is beginning to another phrase but it seem to make me lose more things then gaining?.. i don't know if is a test from the above for me.. but it really sad when no one seem to understand how it feels to being trying to spend time with the one you love.. and not being appreciated.. sometimes really don't know what to give or how much to give then it will be good enough.. or maybe not to give then it will be good.. for me i just feel like giving the best i can..

kind of worried that i wouldn't have time for anyone even myself as my VT is starting soon.. Don't know how to describe the feeling like lost.. Vt is total 3 mths with Airborne.. Going to taiwan for training 21 days + alot of tekong and marlising.. AND airborne course 3 weeks practically outfield and more outfield.. also don't know if is the right choice to go for the CSLC..

I guess if not for you i wouldn't even try.. just want to thank you for giving me the fighting spirit.. you are the only reason why i'm still going..

Can't talk so much of my ns =P confidential.. zipped.. alright enough of talking crap try to updated soon.. but doubt can lah. CSLC really like mini ranger course.. no time.. just wish that everyone would be fine.. Take care ya everyone..

posted by Gino at 2:02 AM